English Translation at the end of the post

 

I et evighetsperspektiv, så er ikke 25 år så lang tid.

Men det er en begynnelse.

Idag er det 25 år siden min kjære eks-krølltopp og jeg ble viet i Stockholm Tempel  for tid og all evighet.

Det er litt vanskelig å fatte at jeg har tilbragt over halve livet mitt med ham, men sånn er det.

Jeg tenker ikke så mye på at vi skal være sammen ‘i all evighet’. Evighetsbegrepet er litt uhåndterlig og abstrakt for meg, men jeg tenker at dersom vi skal ønske å være sammen bestandig, også etter dette livet – så er det nok en fordel å like å tilbringe tid med hverandre her og nå også. Derfor er det viktig at vi tar vare på ekteskapet vårt hver dag.

6. april er det 9 år siden Marjorie Pay Hinckley gikk bort, 92 år gammel. Hun var et av mine store forbilder som mor og hustru. Hun hadde en fantastisk sans for humor, og en egen evne til å fokusere på det positive i alt.

Her er et par sitater fra henne som i stor grad har formet mitt syn på ekteskapet og livet:

“I know it is hard for you young mothers to believe that almost before you can turn around the children will be gone and you will be alone with your husband. You had better be sure you are developing the kind of love and friendship that will be delightful and enduring. Let the children learn from your attitude that he is important. Encourage him. Be kind. It is a rough world, and he, like everyone else, is fighting to survive. Be cheerful. Don’t be a whiner.”

“As we got closer to marriage, I felt completely confident that Gordon loved me. But I also knew somehow that I would never come first with him. I knew I was going to be second in his life and that the Lord was going to be first. And that was okay. It seemed to me that if you understood the gospel and the purpose of our being here, you would want a husband who put the Lord first.”

“Develop some intellectual curiosity. If you have it, you will never be bored. If you haven’t, cultivate it, hold fast to it. Never let it go. To the intellectually curious, the world will always be full of magic, full of wonder. You will be interesting to your friends, to your spouse, and a joy to your children. You will be alive to all the wonderful possibilities of this world.”

“I am very grateful for a husband who always lets me do my own thing. … He never insists that I do anything his way, or any way for that matter. From the very beginning he gave me space and let me fly.”What a man!”

I et brev til Marjorie da de hadde vært gift i nesten 60 år, skrev Gordon:

“When in some future day the hand of death gently touches one or the other of us, there will be tears, yes, but there will also be a quiet and certain assurance of reunion and eternal companionship.”

Forhåpentligvis har JB og jeg mange år igjen sammen til å elske, leve, lære, vokse og utvikle forholdet vårt. Men det er godt å ha en visshet om at dersom en av oss skulle forlate livet tidligere enn forventet, så er det likevel ikke over. Adskillelsen vil bare være midlertidig.  Og det er jeg evig takknemlig for.

 

In English:

In an eternal perspective, 25 years is not a long time.

But it is a beginning.

Today is the  25th anniversary  of the day my dear ex-curly haired husband and I were sealed for time and all eternity i the Stockholm Temple.

It is hard to fathom that I have spent more than half my life with him, but I have!

I don’t really spend much time thinking about the fact that we will be together for time and all eternity. The concept of eternity is a bit difficult to grasp and abstract to me. However I do think that if we are to even want to be together forever, it might be a good idea to like spending time together here and now as well. That is why it is important that we take care of our marriage every day.

April 6th marks 9 years since the passing of  Marjorie Pay Hinckley, at 92 years of age. She was truly one of my heroines and exemplars when it comes to motherhood and marriage. she had an amazing sense of humor and a particular gift when it came to seeing the positive in everything.

I thought I would share a couple of quotes from her, that have shaped my view of marriage and life:

“I know it is hard for you young mothers to believe that almost before you can turn around the children will be gone and you will be alone with your husband. You had better be sure you are developing the kind of love and friendship that will be delightful and enduring. Let the children learn from your attitude that he is important. Encourage him. Be kind. It is a rough world, and he, like everyone else, is fighting to survive. Be cheerful. Don’t be a whiner.”

“As we got closer to marriage, I felt completely confident that Gordon loved me. But I also knew somehow that I would never come first with him. I knew I was going to be second in his life and that the Lord was going to be first. And that was okay. It seemed to me that if you understood the gospel and the purpose of our being here, you would want a husband who put the Lord first.”

“Develop some intellectual curiosity. If you have it, you will never be bored. If you haven’t, cultivate it, hold fast to it. Never let it go. To the intellectually curious, the world will always be full of magic, full of wonder. You will be interesting to your friends, to your spouse, and a joy to your children. You will be alive to all the wonderful possibilities of this world.”

“I am very grateful for a husband who always lets me do my own thing. … He never insists that I do anything his way, or any way for that matter. From the very beginning he gave me space and let me fly.”What a man!”

In a letter to Marjorie, as they were approaching their 60th wedding anniversary, Gordon wrote:

“When in some future day the hand of death gently touches one or the other of us, there will be tears, yes, but there will also be a quiet and certain assurance of reunion and eternal companionship.”

Hopefully JB and I still have many years left of life to love, learn, grow and develop our relationship. But it is comforting to have the assurance that should one of us depart earlier than imagined, it won’t be over. The separation will only be temporary. And for that I am eternally grateful.